Funny quotes for women will
Well, you didn't come here to read drivel from me. On to the funny quotes for women.
I'd much rather be a woman than a man. Women can cry, they can wear cute clothes, and they are the first to be rescued off of sinking ships.
Some people are alive only because it is illegal to kill them.
The odds of going to the store for a loaf of bread and coming out with only a loaf of bread are three billion to one.
Mothers, food, love, and career: the four major guilt groups.
Life was so much easier when your clothes didn't match and boys had cooties!
Stand firm in your refusal to remain conscious during algebra. In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.
A true friend stabs you in the front.
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
All my life, I always wanted to be somebody. Now I see that I should have been more specific.
Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.
I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
People who snore always fall asleep first.
My wife and I were happy for 20 years -- then we met.
It's kind of fun to do the impossible.
I believe in dragons, fairies, good men and other mythical creatures!
A word to the wise ain't necessary -- it's the stupid ones that need the advice.
(Unnecessary interruption in funny quotes for women.)
I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes.
I washed a sock. Then I put it in the dryer. When I took it out, it was gone.
I buy expensive suits. They just look cheap on me.
Before I met my husband I'd never fallen in love, though I'd stepped in it a few times.
Marrying for love may be a bit risky, but it is so honest that God can't help but smile on it.
Cross country skiing is great if you live in a small country.
My uncle Sammy was an angry man. He had printed on his tombstone: 'What are you looking at?'
If we're not supposed to eat animals, how come they're made out of meat?
Don't marry a man to reform him - that's what reform schools are for.
Getting married is a lot like getting into a tub of hot water. After you get used to it, it ain't so hot.
Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?
Until you walk a mile in another man's moccasins you can't imagine the smell.
Who says nothing is impossible. I've been doing nothing for years.
I intend to live forever, or die trying.
You can't have everything... where would you put it?
Life is hard. After all, it kills you.
If high heels were so wonderful, men would be wearing them.
If men can run the world, why can't they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a little noose around your neck?
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