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Starting right now..."
August 11, 2020

August 11, 2020 Issue #173

Putting conditions on your happiness spoils today

We singles all want to be happy, but we have some really strange ways of going about it.

One of the most dangerous tactics (and of course I have been guilty of this myself) is putting conditions on our happiness. We make up a checklist of desires and demand that every one be fulfilled before we can allow ourselves to be happy.


That's for heaven, not this planet! Everything will be perfect there, because we'll be with Jesus, but in the meantime, we can't postpone our lives by waiting until everything is just right.

Why is this so important? Because of that thing on your wall called a calendar. Months keep flipping over, years keep changing. Time waits for nobody!

Grab onto all the happiness you can every single day, fellow singleton. Get some tips in this month's feature article.

Start right now

Maybe tomorrow things will be right.
My dreams will come true,
all in one night.

I'll win the Lotto and be richer than God,
I'll look like a model
instead of a clod.

I'll marry a dreamboat and we'll sail away.
Our life will be like
one long Christmas Day.

Or maybe tomorrow I'll get off the shelf,
stop making excuses
and kidding myself.

Stop being a world class procrastinator
and start fighting back
like a gladiator.

On second thought I think I'll start it today,
and I won't let anything
get in my way.

So buckle your seatbelt, time to strap in.
Start right now
and make it happen!

~ Jack Zavada,, 2020 ~

Does God really care about your life?

The recurring theme in Hope for Hurting Singles is that God does care about your life, and you'll learn several biblical principles that prove it.

As you navigate the single life, you experience a lot of disappointment, just as I did. I couldn't understand why I couldn't get the things I wanted.

I was slow to mature. It took decades for me to learn the truths in this book. But once I got it firmly entrenched in my being that God does care about me, that God loves me, my life started to turn around.

By the time you finish reading Hope for Hurting Singles, you'll know for sure that God loves you too. That, my friend, is the bedrock of life-changing hope.

That unshakable hope will help you overcome problems like:

  • Fear
  • Loneliness
  • Shyness
  • Procrastination
  • Low self-esteem
The paperback edition is $10.99 and the Kindle version is $3.99.

Influencer Carnegie offers our August QOTM

Author and personal development guru Dale Carnegie has our August Quote of the Month:

One of the most tragic things I know about human nature is that all of us tend to put off living. We are all dreaming of some magical rose garden over the horizon instead of enjoying the roses that are blooming outside our windows today.
~ Dale Carnegie (1888 - 1955) ~

As we enter our sixth month in the pandemic, government restrictions prevent us from doing many of the activities we enjoy. Lots of stuff has been put on hold, but the calendar has not.

The same is true of our lives as singles. Some of us say, "When I find that special someone…" or "When I get married…" or "When I get my dream job…"

What about now, right in this moment? Are you missing out on the joys of the present? I try to juice whatever happiness I can squeeze out of every day, even during this lockdown.

Savor your meals and be thankful for them. Take time to acknowledge people who are kind to you. Be extra polite to clerks and store workers. Enjoy the trees and clouds every day; they're gorgeous gifts from God.

Being grateful for what you do have pumps joy into your life.

This should be every single's secret goal

Goals are wonderful things. I always have some goals I'm trying to achieve, from my daily chore list to writing a new book. Goals keep you on track and give purpose to your life.

No matter where you live in the world, there's one goal you should strive for every day, for the rest of your life: growing in contentment.

If you believe commercials and ads, you'll never be contented. You'll always want more, and believe me, more of what they're selling will not make you feel contented. No sooner than you buy it, they'll tell you you need a newer version! It never stops. Contentment, on the other hand, is the art of being satisfied with what you already have. Single friend, that's bad for the economy but good for your soul.

Instead of lying in bed at night thinking, "What can I buy that will make me happy?", you'll be thinking "Thanks, God, for everything I already have."

When you focus on contentment instead of what others think, you'll be on your way to a happier life.

Here's a whole barrel of ideas on where you can find contentment.

A rarely-discussed truth about Jesus…

We know many things about Jesus of Nazareth from the Bible. He was the Son of God. He died on the cross for our sins and rose from the dead. Jesus is alive today.

He was fully human and fully God. He was a carpenter, like his earthly father Joseph, but the Bible never shows him actually doing any carpentry work.

Jesus was also a single man. He never married. That is crucial for you and me, because in his humanity, Jesus experienced all the emotions and desires we do as singles. I've never heard a sermon on that topic, probably because most pastors like to talk about marriage and families.

Come to think of it, in my 60+ years of going to church, I've never heard a sermon exclusively about the problems single people face.

But Jesus knows. He felt loneliness, just as you do. He felt frustration and depression. He knew what it was to feel like an outcast. It's not far-fetched to believe Jesus longed for all the fulfillment a good marriage can bring. He knew he couldn't get married, of course, but that doesn't mean he never thought about it.

Jesus never sinned, which means all those things he felt were natural and legitimate. The same holds true for you, when you feel lonely or depressed.

Here's the takeaway: Jesus understands, not just because he is God, but because he was a single human being.

That's important to remember when you go to him in prayer. He understands what you're going through. He knows the highs and lows of the single life. Jesus laughs with you and he hurts with you.

The Holy Spirit is inside you, helping you get through these hard times. Jesus is pulling for you. He understands and he never gives up on you. He loves you more than you could ever imagine.

That concludes our August issue. To email me, please use our secure contact form.

We're still going through hard times, but with God's help and common sense, we'll get through them. Until September, single friend, hold onto Jesus--and wear your mask!

Jack Zavada

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