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Why do singles suffer?
January 15, 2019

January 15, 2019 Issue #154

Why do single people suffer?

We all do it: suffer.

In this month's feature article we'll look at the why's, especially why Christian singles suffer, and what we can do about it. You may find some surprises.

Just a reminder. You can trust the links in this newsletter. If you don't and never read the linked-to articles, you might as well unsubscribe now (instructions at the bottom).

Without further ado, check out why singles suffer.

The way of thinking little

Life is overwhelming
But there's a simple way to cope.
A way that cuts things down to size,
A way that gives you hope.

It's the way of thinking little
When you feel you want to quit.
You face up to your problem
And attack it bit by bit.

A little progress every day,
A little bit each hour.
Victory on victory.
That's the steady path to power.

You won't hear a cheering crowd,
No ticker tape parade.
But you will know you're gaining ground
With every step that's made.

The way of thinking little
Is the way big things get done.
A tiny conquest every day
Until your battle's won!

~ Jack Zavada, 2019, ~

Pain prevention for singles

Do you enjoy suffering?

What an absurd question! Nobody enjoys suffering, yet incredibly, we all do things that bring pain and unhappiness down on ourselves.

Hope for Hurting Singles will show you how to prevent much of that self-inflicted misery. It will teach you proven ways to be a confident, joy-filled person:

  • Find one of the most important sources of hope for singles (page 10).
  • How to use rejection to ruin your life — or not. (page 46)
  • How to turn discouragement into a powerful motivator. (page 71)
  • Do this to overcome fear. (page 98)
  • Discover who you really want to please. (page 137)
  • What to do when you get tired of waiting. (Page 177)

Learn from the mistakes I made so you don't repeat them. Learn from the mistakes I observed in others. But most importantly, copy my techniques for making wiser decisions, leading to a calmer life.

If you made a list of New Year's resolutions for 2019, Hope for Hurting Singles can help you achieve them. It uncovers what causes our most aggravating problems then gives clear, doable steps for overcoming them.

Think of some ways you'll spend $10.99 this year. Then think about investing that same amount in a happier, more fulfilling life.

Easy-peasy choice!

Hope for Hurting Singles is available in paperback on

John Piper nails it with January's QOTM

While searching for an appropriate quotation about suffering for this issue, I happened upon this one by author, pastor, and Bible teacher John Piper. It reflects my own experience:

This is God's universal purpose for all Christian suffering: more contentment in God and less satisfaction in the world.
    ~ John Piper (1946 - ) ~

You and I were made for God. We are strangers here; our true home is heaven. The older I get, the more disillusionment I find with the world's answers and the more fulfillment I find with God.

If a single person does not have Jesus, he or she is the most pathetic of all beings. Suffering makes sense only if it drives us to God. God alone satisfies. God alone is the cure for that ache in your heart.

Here's some encouragement for 2019!

Change, change, change. We all vow to change at the beginning of every new year, but by the time June rolls around (or is it April?), most of us have slithered back into the same old, same old rut.

If there's one thing we've got plenty of at, it's encouragement. You'll find dozens of articles and tips on the site to keep you motivated to change.

Here are a few ideas to get you going and keep you going in 2019:

How to be kind to yourself…

Why you matter — and what to do about it…

The proven secret for achieving your goals…

A definition of success that makes sense…

How to rise above discouragement…

Find hope in 2019…

How to really stand out in the world

Think about the people you love. What do they have in common? They're all kind, aren't they? Without exception, they go out of their way to do thoughtful things for others. When you think about it, such people are really rare. Most of us toddle along on our own way, so wrapped up in our little problems that we don't make the effort to give the simple gift of compassion to another.

Here's a jarring truth: Every human being on this planet is hurting in some way, no matter how cheerful they seem on the outside. A word of support or even a small gift can make a bigger impact than you'll ever know. We all want to feel appreciated. Choose kindness and you'll really stand out in the world. And surprise! People will love you back.

Our theme of suffering in this newsletter has to be taken in perspective. It's important for each of us to see the big picture. While heaven is our true home and the only perfect life will be there, we can't simply give up until the Lord calls us home. We have work to do here on earth, serving God and others. When you enjoy God, you can enjoy your life.

Let me repeat that I don't write these newsletters for shallow thinkers. In fact, as I try to come up with articles that speak to your needs, I picture you as a highly intelligent person who wants a better life and has the courage to make changes so that can happen.

In 2019, I'll be making some changes in myself,, and in these newsletters. The percentage of singles who open Inspire-O-Gram is small but loyal. I hope you'll send me your comments and insights over the course of this year. To prevent spambots, I'm forced to use a contact form, but I promise you it forwards into my personal inbox and I will answer you personally, not with a form letter.

Thanks again for reading, fellow singleton. Every month it's a privilege to write to you, a privilege I don't take lightly. As we navigate the single life together, let's remind ourselves Jesus Christ was a single person and has a special place in his heart for you and me.

Jack Zavada
401 Indiana Ave
Streator, IL 61364 USA

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