Anger: Are you frustrated at God because you're still single?


Experiencing anger with God is common among single people.

For Christian singles, this presents another problem. We also feel guilty because we believe our anger shows disrespect or lack of love.

But is that really the case? Is being mad or frustrated with God always a sign of disrespect? First, you have to remember that God created you with emotions, and often those emotions are very hard to control. You're not a robot. You have needs and wants that you try to satisfy. When you can't get your needs met, you will feel angry and frustrated.

Is God offended at that? Does he want to send a lightning bolt down and blast you off the face of the earth? If that were true, there would be millions of scorch marks all over the planet, because that's how many people are angry at God.

Many years ago, when I was in the hospital and my doctor told me I had cancer, I became very angry at God. I had done my best to live a Christian life. I knew that I wasn't perfect, of course, but I had done my best to follow God's commandments. During that time, a very wise Catholic nun told me that it was all right to be mad at God.

"Tell him. He's big. He can take it," she said.

God wants us to be honest

She told me that God wants us to be honest with him. He wants you to pour out your heart to him. He wants you to bring all your hurt and disappointment to him and lay it at his feet. When you're angry and frustrated, it's always right to express that to God and to tell him why.

We forget that God knows and understands us better than we know ourselves. We also forget that even though we're in pain, God always has a tremendous love for us.

We always underestimate God's love

and compassion for us.

It's only when you're completely honest with God that your prayers take on real power. It's often been said that you can't solve a problem until you recognize that there is a problem.


When you pour out your heart to God, you experience a sense of relief. You take what had been your problem and put it in his hands. Now it's his problem, and you know what? God is always bigger than your problems.

Another thing that happens is that you begin to take your eyes off your problem and put them on God. Your perspective changes. Instead of struggling alone, you turn the matter over to the almighty God of the universe, who knows all and controls all.

Restored and unburdened

Your anger may not disappear right away, nor will your guilt, but you feel restored and unburdened. Instead of spending all your time complaining, you ask God to change your heart and strengthen you to do what is needed. You promise to follow his leading and ask the Holy Spirit to guide you. You stop trying too hard.

You turn the corner. You begin to live life with a sense of expectancy, knowing that God wants what's best for you. You start seeing opportunities. You feel God's strength and love taking hold in you. You begin to understand what's holding you back and ask God to change that in you.

Resentment at being offended comes when we feel disrespected. But when you take hold of God's love for you, it makes you stronger against the slights of others. God's approval is what counts. If you follow Jesus, you have it.

Our anger or frustration is never an excuse to violate God's Commandments. God is always our Lord and Master and is worthy of our complete obedience. But anger with God can be used constructively if it helps us make positive changes. We all need to change if we want to become more like Christ.

Expressing your frustration to God can put you on the path to positive change, if you're willing to be honest with both God and yourself.

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