Christian men have it tough, and the only other people who really appreciate just how tough it is are other Christian men.
You may wonder why you often feel frustrated. You may have nagging doubts or suppressed anger. You may look at your life and be deeply depressed about your prospects.
The workplace is a neverending source of dissatisfaction. You want to advance. You want to make more money, rise higher in your company, but you don't want to do the things that will take you there.
You're shocked at the cheating and lying that goes on. You may be pegged as unambitious or not a team player because your Christian ethics won't let you walk all over people. If you're stuck, you may become angry at God because following his laws doesn't seem to be getting you anywhere. In fact, they seem to hold you back.
Then there's the problem of women. Ha! It is a problem, isn't it? Christian women lament the fact that they can't find any decent single Christian men. And you feel the same way about women.
You don't want to date a nonbeliever. You don't want to sleep around, but you do have strong desires and needs, too. Our culture tells you that it's all right, that it's the thing to do. Men's magazines turn it into a game. But you know better. You know the Truth.
If Jesus' original apostles were fishers of men, then we 21st century Christian men are fish out of water. Our faith in Jesus Christ brings us deep loneliness, and it hurts. We never talk about it to anyone, even our best friend or our pastor, because that would be a sign of weakness. God forbid we should show any sign of weakness!
My Aunt Mary made a profound statement several years ago:
"I never knew men could get hurt until I had sons of my own."
We do get hurt. So what are single Christian men to do? Should we compromise? Should we lower our ethics at work, hoping God will understand? Should we follow the urgings of our flesh and lower our standards there, too? What should we do? What should we do?
Since I'm probably older than you, let me tell you what I did in my life and you be the judge of whether it would make sense for you.
I've always been something of a Puritan. I've never had a drink of alcohol, never smoked a cigarette, and have never taken any kind of illegal drugs. Lest you think I sound arrogant, I've always had a problem with my language, and now, in middle age, I'm finally getting it under control, but not without a lifetime of struggle and help from God. But I'll be completely honest with you: My Christian ethics have often made me stick out like a sore thumb.
I missed promotions at work because I refused to compromise. I didn't make as much money as I could have because I tried to put God and his ways first, not my job. I try to be open minded and respect other people's opinions, but when it comes to choosing between the world's way and God's way, I have tried to walk with God. Looking back on my life, I regret the times I chose the world's ways over God's. I have often known pain, loneliness, rejection, and frustration. It hasn't been an easy life. But I can tell you this:
I have never regretted following God.
In my life I have experienced miracles so stunning that they have made me weep at the depth of God's love for me. He has pulled me out of jams when I thought the situation was hopeless. He has always been with me through the heartaches and doubts, and he has rewarded my obedience with indescribable joy.
We Christian men have an absolutely faithful helper in the Holy Spirit. We have God's Word, the Bible, to guide us in making right decisions. We have the support of our pastor, our parents, and our church family. And we have Jesus.Nobody understands like Jesus.
His life on earth was the model for all Christian men. He will give you the courage to lead it. He hears your prayers and knows exactly what you're going through. I want to encourage you today to keep on keeping on. Stay faithful. Stay honest. Stay pure. We are the elite. We are called by God as his chosen people. It is all worth it.
So hang in there, Buddy. We're all praying for you.
As one Christian man to another, I can tell you I've learned a lot about living the single life in nearly 40 years.
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Read our article, "Life's Toughest Decision" on about.com
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