Overcoming shyness is a matter of taking many small steps to success

When it comes to achieving something worthwhile, we rarely do it all at once. Overcoming shyness is no different.

As a single person, you may be very unhappy that you're not bolder and more assertive. Shyness is usually not a character trait that we brag about.

If you're determined, however, you can triumph over your shyness. One of the keys is to not expect too much too soon.

One task at a time

Let's say you're learning to play a musical instrument. You wouldn't take one lesson and expect to be a virtuoso, would you? That's just not realistic.

The same holds true with overcoming shyness. Small victories lead to bigger ones. Master one skill, then move up to the next.

Soon you'll be putting all your new abilities together to be a confident, self-assured person.

Using The Secret

When you're shy--and I had severe shyness problems myself--you tend to be in awe of people who project an air of poise. But they may not be as sure of themselves as you think.

You've forgotten one of life's most important secrets. They're acting out what they want to be true.

They're fearful, yet going ahead in spite of their fear. They've become bigger than their fears.

Recently, while watching a network news program on TV, I watched the anchor interview one of the news correspondents who has been on the show for many years.

This correspondent has a talent for taking complicated economic issues and making them easy to understand. I noticed that when the correspondent picked up a paper to make a point, his hand was shaking.

Here was a man who has been in front of TV cameras for years, who was in a friendly setting, yet was inwardly nervous about it. It just proves that overcoming shyness may be a lifelong battle, but that it can be done.

Recognize others' importance

One effective way to build your confidence is to talk to strangers. Of course you have to keep your own safety in mind, but most people are inwardly lonely and are very receptive when someone shows genuine interest in them.

Start with store clerks and cashiers. Go beyond the usual "Hi" or "How are you?" I've found that busy cashiers are startled--in a good way--when you answer their question, "How are you?" with "I'm doing well today. How are you doing?" Most customers treat cashiers like a machine, no different from the cash register.

Getting a positive response from strangers will encourage you to reach out more often and in a sincere, caring way. I'm almost always pleasantly gratified when I affirm another person's importance.

This is what Jesus wants us to do. Loving others means taking an interest in them, seeing them as a real person who has worth.

Where'd my fear go?

When you're serious about overcoming shyness, you'll find that most of the fears you have never come to pass.

Oh, sure, you'll occasionally be snubbed or snapped at by others, but that's their problem, not yours. And even when it does happen, you'll quickly realize, "Hey, that wasn't so hard. And I didn't die!"

Whether it's going on a first date with someone, or being in a work situation with a person you don't know, you'll discover that people can be extraordinarily kind, if you'll give them the chance.

Overcoming shyness is an accomplishment that will make your life happier, richer, and more satisfying. God will always give you support and strength when you come out of your shell and reach out to others.

With God's help, you'll find that the thing you once feared has become an exciting, fulfilling adventure.

Shyness and loneliness go hand-in-hand

I know firsthand that shyness leads to loneliness. But life doesn't have to be that way.

My new ebook, Outsmarting Loneliness, shows how to get the edge on this frustrating problem.

You start slowly, at your own pace and in your own comfort zone. No scary risks or trials. Then, as you build confidence, you move to the next Level, the next, and the next. Trust me--I was a shy person, so I made this simple, easy and doable.

I'm so convinced this book can help you that it carries a money back guarantee. How often do you see that on a book?

Click this link for all the details on Outsmarting Loneliness.

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