Do you catastrophize over problems?
When you catastrophize over a problem, you make your life much harder than it needs to be.
I should know. I've been doing it for decades, but I'm doing less and less of it because I have stopped relying on myself for the solution. That's the key.
The term "catastrophize" is self-explanatory. You turn every upsetting circumstance into a catastrophe, an impending doomsday scenario in which the worst possible consequence happens. As your imagination runs wild, you work yourself into a mental frenzy. Sound familiar?
The head-banging frustration about all this is you've done it so many times, you know how destructive it is, but you can't seem to stop.
Yep, it's hard. It's so hard it takes constant vigilance and reliance on God to change this habit, but it can be done. I'm going to show you some techniques that are working for me when I'm managing my emotions.
Seeing one important truth
So many single people catastrophize that it's truly rare to find a person who is calm and untroubled by the pressure around them. When we see one of these peaceful souls, we ask, "What's their secret?"
Their secret is they make real this truth: I don't have to catastrophize. I have a choice."
Most of us don't realize we do have a choice. We think worrying is our only possible response. Worrying gives us the illusion we're actually doing something about the problem.
But we're not.
Worry must be one of Satan's favorite tools because it keeps us from trusting in God. The devil employs any lie he can to separate us from the loving help our Father is eager to give us.
But knowing we have a choice to remain unruffled and trying to do it through our own willpower is where we usually stumble. We want so badly to maintain the status quo that we freak out when anything threatens it. We also have a lifetime habit of catastrophizing as our go-to strategy.
Catastrophize vs. try something new
One of the illogical aspects of human nature is our tendency to repeat previous behavior, even when it's bad for us. Catastrophizing falls into that category. We keep doing things that are harmful for us because they're familiar. Familiar equals comfortable, even when it may be destructive.
Our screwy little minds reason, "Well, this worked in the past, so I'll do it again."
Yeah, it worked badly.
But our selective memory only recalls that we got through the last crisis. We forget we turned our self into a nervous basket-case doing it.
Trying something different takes courage, a courage we can't generate on our own. We have to get that kind of courage from God and rely on him to have our back, no matter what happens.
Tamping down the urge to go bananas (as usual) at the first sign of trouble forces you to put your hand in God's and take that leap of faith.
Here's the thing: Even if the situation turns out rotten, God will help you get through it or he will turn it for your good. That's what I had to learn the second time I got cancer. I trusted God. I decided if the news from my test was bad, he got me through that ordeal before and would do it again.
True confession: I don't claim to have all the answers nor am I perfect. I am still working, with God's help, on correcting the many flaws in my character. But I only give advice on this site I have tried myself and which agrees with the Bible.
God taught me I didn't have to make myself sick worrying about cancer. And I'm writing these words today because he did get me through it twice.
Did Jesus ever give bad advice?
The Living Bible has a good translation of Matthew 6:34:
“So don’t be anxious about tomorrow. God will take care of your tomorrow too. Live one day at a time."
As Christians, we agree with Jesus, but do we put his teachings into practice? In my own life, it has been a long, hard struggle. Then I beat myself up for making the wrong choice. But God is merciful. He forgives and points me in the right direction.
This life we lead consists of tripping, falling, and having God lift us back up again. It's rocky, not smooth. Sanctification, that great task of the Holy Spirit, continues in us until the day we die. We "arrive" only when we pass through heaven's gates.
In the meantime, we can cut down on catastrophizing by repeating that God is with us, no matter what happens. We prepare as best we can, but our peace comes from the loving presence of God, no matter how things turn out.
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